Tabloid Two

Seren_dipity & TrappedInMyMind have invaded the sacred BS forum. Why? It seems anyone coming from any other forum has to come with another person. It’s like a Noah’s ark thing. Freakin’ Bible thumpers---gosh. Anyway I hear the reason that they are here is because they were attacked by angry homeless people. Yes that does suck being attacked by people that don’t bathe. They attacked them with clumps of dirt that the homeless people had stored away in the dark pits of their body. Don’t ask. So they come here (more ways than one) to try and take over the entire forum. So add them to the list of meanie heads trying to convert BS for their own agenda. If you can’t count this now makes four people.

C0urtz has returned from the dark regions of hell. The reason hell let her go is because she promises to bring several people back to take her place. See hell loved her and really didn’t want to give her up. But for several more souls it decided what the hell. So C0urtz is here to take some of y’all back. Be careful of her and her questions. Answer the wrong ones she’ll snag your soul. See the soul has a combination on it. Only those that know the combination will unlock the soul. The combination works by saying certain words within a span of a day. If the words are said in a certain order then BAM your soul is so going to the person that opened the lock. Will you notice? Uh no duh. Gosh Google it or something. You have been warned. Don’t be mad C0urtz you know it’s the truth.

Agent69 has been laying low (hahaha sorry) and has not surfaced often. She’s searching people. Don’t be the one that gets snagged for the rough scab making sex. It hurts. Just take my 3 years (yes I said years no minutes) experience to heart.

Dajumez was seen fumbling through the dark. Night vision goggles were used. Don’t ask who it was they are to be kept top secret. He was in someone’s room looking through their private things. Private things as in the drawer of the panties and stuff like that there. CrazyChic had arrived home early this night (yeah he’s done it several times) and faster than a cockroach in a crack house he scattered to get under the bed. He couldn’t see so he stumped his toe on one of the cement blocks that held up the bed. He yelped. She found him. And just like porn gone wrong she screamed. So if you’ve seen the limping Dajumez he’s wanted for panty sniffing. Oh he still has the panties that have the phrase “scratch and sniff” on them.

Im_the_Man had a “Appreciate Virgin” night at the local 24 Hour News Stand. Yeah weird but hands down it is the coolest place to have it you must agree. Moving on he gave praises to everyone that showed up and how they are so awesome for being the way they were. From the pictures taken by the awesome photographer that makes Peter Parker look like he has web in his eye these guys don’t look like it was a choice matter to be a virgin. Hahahahahahahahhaha losers. There was a part of the meeting that had people stand up and say something. “I’m still a virgin is this weird?” Was a question asked by a 6 year old. Weird you are dear boy, weird you are.

Tomtyke may moonlight as a gremlin but that’s not all he moonlights as. Okay so he’s not some sort of guy that dresses up like a woman. That is what moonlighting would indicate. Therefore I shouldn’t of use the word. Sorry. Get over it. Okay so here it is he has the cool restaurant up town on the posh side. Everyone loves it. It’s the place to go for a good stake or hamburger. They say the meat is so baby fresh so to speak. Well how sad they must feel when they found out that it was actually babies. We have photos of Tomtyke scavenging through the trashcans of the abortion clinics owned ElementSktGirl and Bigtuna. He might as well ask them to deliver the babies straight to his kitchen because he practically cleans the trash can out. Oh and he really does clean it out—he licks it clean. One of his best friends states that he loves the taste of abortion blood. Tasty. RubDaPimp and TransmissionNOTHING are his two chiefs. They have been praised for their great work making the meat tender and smooth. MmmMM makes you hungry right? It better because it’s still open. He even caters. His number is 1-800-Eat-Baby. He’s so clever.

Duffman7 is new to the BS way of life but he isn’t so new because we’ve seen him before. Well not really but when you see one twin you practically know what the other one looks like. That’s right he’s a twin with no one other than Jammer. Jammer had given him advice to speak to Minion because unknown to everyone – for a while now – he’s a Jedi Master in hiding. Jammer and Duffman7 are twins but odd twins because Jammer is much older than Duffman7. It was an Odd Birth. Jammer was born first and then 10 years later Duffman7 was born and they’ve looked the same ever since. Some have even speculated (nasty thought) that Jammer is really his father. Shocking. Minion laughed off Duffman7 to train him in the ways of the light side. So Duffman7 trashed a hotel room and spit on a dog and now says he will find someone to train him and then prove Minion wrong. Minion says that he’s never wrong so BOOM and then he blasted Pink Floyd and danced with a light saber like it was a baton or something.

Dom69 just signed with a boy band. Their name has not been decided on. They are still looking for two more members. Will320069 tried out but the hoody muffled his singing and they couldn’t have a muffler on the band so they told him no. Raycist tried out but was denied since he wanted to sing nude. They did, however, give his “head” shots to Bobwantsyou. She was spotted going to a molding shop with picture in hand.

Wutshappening2me was caught red handed with the BS Panty sniffer Dajumez. They were walking into a Victoria Secret. Someone quickly find him before he sniffs more panties of poor unsuspecting girls.

CoffeeShopLame has arrived as a BS Jedi. His master was Minion but he had put in a transfer to be under Will320069 and therefore Will gets the point for bring him to Jedi status really quick. Now they both play with each others light sabers like good Jedi. Marc is sad he can’t join in the fun. He’s still under Minion.

Thesmartdude has invested in BIG doors. He invested his entire life savings into this new industry. He hopes it will take off in the next day or two. But it looks like women are only shooting out vertically challenged kids for the past 20 years. Things don’t look good for the big door business. Nope not at all.

BS Detectives have been trying to figure out whose bloody hand prints are all over a certain someone’s wall. Pictures have surfaced with bloody hands on them. They have analyzed the pictures and found out that the hands do have blood on them but were hidden under some layers of paint. Why someone took a picture of their hands with the evidence on it is unknown by the Detectives. They have stated that Big Mac With Cheese is a suspect as the owner of such hands. The blood was found in an unknown person’s home. The detectives are unsure if the person was murdered or just beaten in the face with an unusually huge pinecone they found on the ground.

The Pandas Cow and Fish have been found wondering the BS Random Forest. If they are not picked up by tonight they will be come the Tabloid’s new Bear rugs. We have snipers standing by.

The BS annual Orgy was canceled due to a ramped case of mad cow. Please get into contact with the Orgy Committee. The following people are on the committee: Ashxo, Ronald_mcd, Bobwantsyou, Raycist, and Phoenix_89.

Pot was found in the mod’s house. It has been speculated that it was placed there during their vacation but Will and Topanga (Steely has been MIA and a search party has been dispatched) have been seen eating massive amounts of Pie. Munchies?

Be careful the eyes are watching. And until next time keep your shades close and your shoes inside.